Friday, May 31, 2013

Putting It Into Words

I have never been one that is great with expressing my emotions. Believe me, I express them often, but at times I struggle to find the right words for them.

When dealing with infertility, I really struggled. It seems as though unless you have been through it, you don't understand. I think it is something you think you understand, but you just don't.



I recently came across this post by the courageous Tonya Wertman. As I said, as women we think we know what someone is going through, but when you visually see it, it is heartbreaking. Tonya put together this collage of photos so you can see what infertility looks like to her.


I can relate to so many of these. All of the machines, the pictures of babies lining the office and wondering if yours will ever be up there. The needles, the meds, the tears and then the slap in your face after all of that...not pregnant.

Through Tonya I realized what I was suffering from was Secondary Infertility. I never knew that there was a difference, but S.I. is infertility after a successful first pregnancy without the use of medication or Drs help. I also found her Pinterest board. How many times I would have LOVED to have had these words to explain how I was feeling, or even more so.... the words explain to ME how I was feeling. Here are some from her Secondary Infertility board that really struck home.


How true this is for us, we weren't going to try in March as we were
trying to avoid another December baby, glad we decided to try.

I am sorry if this is offensive to anyone, I don't mean for it to be, but man this is EXACTLY what it felt like...

Thank you Tonya for helping me find my voice when I struggled searching for it for so long. I will be praying for you and your family.

8 comments:

Tonya said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

This post is why I am so open about my journey! I am so glad I have been able to help you in some small way. Best of luck to you. xo

seespeakhearmama.wordpress.com said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Wow! There really are no other words to describe my deep connection and knowing of this topic. I felt every picture...every encouraging word. I'm on the other side of this journey after 14 years...oddly enough after having my 1st successful pregnancy my heart aches for another.. We'll see. God has been gracious to me. I have children through marriage, adoption and birth. Life is good but I do know of this longing , this pain and wanted you to know you are not alone. Praying for you.

Kayla A. said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

If you don't mind, could I share and link your post to my blog? I feel a lot of what you wrote and posted. I'm not suffering from secondary infertility, since we just haven't been able to get pregnant at all. But reading your blog is inspiring me to not give up hope and to keep trying! =]

Kalyn Ernest said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

@Tonya
Thank you again Tonya!

Kalyn Ernest said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

@seespeakhearmama.wordpress.com Thank you so much. I will be praying for your family as well.

Kalyn Ernest said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

@Kayla A. Never ever give up hope. You are absolutely welcome to share this on your blog. Feel free to contact me at any time if you need to talk or vent. It is difficult to talk to others who haven't experienced it.

Krystin said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

This is EXACTLY how I feel. SI is something I never thought we'd have to deal with, and like you, didn't know it existed until I was in it. We're still waiting and hopeful. One of these days, I'll have to write about our journey, but just not ready yet. Thank you so much for this post!

Amanda W said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

I can completely relate.. so heartbreaking. Its hard to keep hope!! Successful pregnancy in 2007, D&C for retained placenta... and its been downhill ever since. Four surgeries later and it seems my scarring just gets worse and worse! I used to have some spotting each month, but after my last surgery in March, I haven't had any signs of a cycle. I think of all the unfortunate people out there that can't have one of their own and my heart breaks for them. Its difficult for me to come to terms with only having one, as I have always wanted a big family! Your post touches my heart, as I can connect every single picture to my life for the past 6 years. I will be thinking of you! Best of luck!